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Writer's pictureEsther Schwarz, LSW, MSW

MY TREE

REPLANTING AGAIN IN FRESH HEALTHY SOIL


When a foundation collapses to the ground,

How is it possible for any parts of the structure to stand?

Where does the support come from?

Is something I want to understand.


A healing process is some journey.

Naturally, it starts from the bottom up

In order for a person to heal properly.

Like a tree that looks unhealthy,

Start with the roots in order for it to hold steady.


My healing journey started from the very top,

Looking at my branches that were not holding up.

Slowly I started ebbing away at the rot in them,

Removing piece by piece

To create a healthier tree.


As the branches started healing

I worked my way down to the tree trunk,

Realizing that there was a lot of junk.

Stuck inside an obnoxious funk.


I kept trying to water my tree

Each time I looked up, I saw such beauty.

As I toiled away, I took pride

In this wonderful new design.


My attention was diverted to a leak,

Which was oozing out from the earth beneath.

Where was this coming from?

Below my beautiful, blossoming tree.


Once again, I shoveled and unearthed,

To get to the bottom of the source.

What caught my eye with great shock,

Was the roots of my tree were poisonous.


If I hold onto these roots,

My beautiful tree

I tended to so dearly

Will collapse and die very soon.


NO! I worked so hard

Miraculously my tree trunk

And beautiful branches survived.

After all this toil

It can’t just die and get spoiled.


On my journey of tending to my tree

I built a network, a crew

Who helped me through,

The recovery of my precious tree.


They all flocked together

To help hold my branches of my tree

As I started to uproot the poison

That wanted to suck the life out of me.


Horrific, rotten spoils in the roots,

It’s all dead underneath.

Life can’t survive there,

As I remove the toxic heap.


Now I understand,

G-d it was all in your master-plan.

To help me heal backwards,

In order to survive the poison underneath.


I will remove the lifeless roots,

As different parts of my tree

Will be held and supported

By people who love me.


Oh! It fills my heart with joy,

As I feel the grief

Of removing the damaged soil

That held the dead roots

Which I need to uproot.


The pain is raw and it’s very difficult,

As I rid my tree of poison.

I feel the loss of something I thought I had

I slowly wave goodbye to the rot

Which has stunted my trees growth for years

As I toiled to clean it up with bitter tears.


Goodbye poisonous roots

You haven’t served me well.

Now I need to dust my hands

Off of you as I remove

Every last piece of you from my land.


Thank you, G-d, for my support network and crew

That keep holding my parts of my tree

As I say goodbye to the roots that I thought were good,

It’s something I clearly misunderstood.


As I will heal and get stronger

I will take my beautiful pieces of my tree

And plant it again on fresh, healthy soil

for it will not rot any longer.


It will flourish and thrive

As it will truly be alive

That will be the day

I will know I SURVIVED

And I will THRIVE once again!


As many healthy, beautiful trees

My dear supporters,

We will live together

In harmony, holding each other’s hands forever!!!


THANK YOU!!!

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